GOP Answers Criticism It Can’t Govern With Bill That Allows Members to Visit the Bathroom
Another proposed measure would allow speakers to use fingers and bare toes in the House when counting votes
Smarting from accusations they are incapable of governing, Republicans in the US House of Representatives have launched a series of “meaningful, critically important” bills, starting with one that gives lawmakers the right to go to the bathroom when needed.
The “Lawmakers’ Right to Go the Bathroom When Nature Calls” bill has received widespread support from Republican House members. However, the bill faces some opposition from the party’s monarch, Donald Trump, who would like a provision included in the bill that requires lawmakers to ask him first before they go to the bathroom. House Speaker Mike Johnson has indicated that House Republicans are amenable to the provision.
Another bill on the GOP’s white-hot legislative agenda that echoes the theme of personal freedom is the “Americans’ Right to Sleep When, Where, and How They Want” bill. If passed, the legislation would make it legal for any American to choose when they go to bed and rise, to sleep in any position they prefer, not to remember their dreams, and to get out of bed on any side. A GOP spokesperson said that the law would raise productivity by helping Americans sleep in ways they choose.
“Americans have been screaming for a law like this for years. The GOP is listening to the country and taking action,” said the spokesperson.
A similar bill, also cited by the GOP as vital to the national interest, would enshrine car owners’ rights to wash their vehicles. Under the proposed law, Americans could choose to wash their cars at home, in a car wash or other venue, or not wash at all. Again, the GOP claims the bill has sufficient support to guarantee its passage in the House.
Some of the bills Republicans want to champion are more contentious, although the GOP insists its members widely support them. For example, some bills give citizenship to guns, tax breaks to meat eaters, and free laxatives to lawmakers who have not passed anything for more than a year.
“This legislative agenda proves once and for all that House Republicans know how to govern and can make laws the country desperately needs,” said the GOP spokesperson.
